Why Everything You Think You Know About People Is Wrong
(Warning! This post may be somewhat controversial!)
What you will get from this article:
Discover the one thing that makes us all the same
Find out why everything you think you know about people is wrong
Understand what it is that keeps us separate and unhappy
Learn how to change your life and relationships
We all like to believe that we think we know exactly who people are - but do we really?
People love to go around passing judgement about others. We love to comment on how ______ they are, how they did ______ and should be doing ______. We can't understand why they don't just ______ and stop being so _______. Ultimately, we think everybody should just be more like us!
Here's the thing: Whether we like it or not, whether we want to believe it or not, and whether we can admit it or not, every single human being on the planet is just trying to meet the same needs. Every. Single. One.
As difficult as this may be to wrap our heads around, I can guarantee you that it's true. And here is how I know: If you could be really honest about it, at some point you've gone and done something stupid to stand out or to feel more important or significant in your life. Have you not?
You've also had times when you've chosen not to do something you've wanted to do, because you weren't certain how it was going to turn out, right? You let your fear stop you from doing it.
I'd also be willing to bet that at some point in your life, you've probably played the role of the victim, because you felt hurt or disappointed because things didn't turn out the way you had planned. And you got pissed.
How do I know that you've done these things? Because we all have! Every single last one of us. Because we are human - and all human beings have the same needs.
We don't like to admit it; we don't like to acknowledge it; and we certainly don't like to go around talking about it. We would rather choose to believe that we are somehow better, or different, or more evolved. We like to believe we are 'holier than thou'. My message to you today is that all of that is total B.S.!
What we're really doing is deflecting - we try to make someone else look worse than us because we don't feel good about ourselves. We believe that by stepping on someone else, we can make ourselves look a little taller.
We're busy defending - trying to justify our own behaviour and mistakes so that we don't look bad or appear guilty, instead of looking inward and taking responsibility for our choices.
We're constantly denying - seeking to hide or run away from the truth because we are terrified of being discovered or found out. We lie to ourselves and others in an attempt to avoid ownership of our flaws and our weaknesses.
And we're focused on protecting ourselves because we are all so deeply insecure. Most of us actually feel so bad about ourselves, we can't believe anyone is capable of loving us or really even caring for us in any way. We expect them to let us down, to walk away from us or to not have our back. So we do things that will automatically push them away.
Deep down, all of us are doing the best that we can with what we have at the time. There is always more to people and situations than what we choose to see on the surface. As much as we want to believe that everything is black and white - the truth is that it never really is. Ever.
Assumptions are what get us into trouble. We love to assume the absolute worst about people. It makes for more interesting conversation, after all. We love to assume people are lazy, bad, devious or self-centred. We love to believe they have ulterior motives; that they're lying or trying to get something from us, or they are attempting to deceive us in some way.
The truth is that people are suffering. Internally, silently, deeply suffering. Every human being is craving and longing and dying for love and connection. It is our thoughts and our beliefs and our actions that keep us from achieving it. We see ourselves as separate, so we behave in ways that keep us separate, and the end result is that the world is torn apart by it.
We have become focused on the concept of oneupmanship and 'every man for himself'. Instead of supporting and caring for one another, we've learned to keep our distance and become hoarders of our resources, our ideas, our time and our love and affection. We've somehow come to believe that this is what it will take for us to survive. But the truth is - it's killing us all.
Everything you think you know about people is wrong. You may see them as different or evil or selfish or stupid, but you're seeing them through the eyes of someone who is suffering themselves. Pain comes from the ego because the ego believes in separateness. When we operate from the ego - all we get to experience is pain.
When you can believe that there is good in people; when you choose to believe that people are inherently good; when you can bring yourself to see the similarity in others and begin to have compassion and empathy for them; then you will begin to experience peace.
Compassion and empathy are our paths to freedom and happiness. When we can look past what we think we see on the surface and see deeply into another person's soul - that is where we will find joy.
Everyone has the opportunity to connect and experience love with other human beings, and this opportunity presents itself every single day of our lives. Everything we're longing for is easily and readily available to us - yet every day we choose to shut people out or protect ourselves instead of being open to receiving.
All we have to do to achieve everything we really want, is to be willing to look at other people differently. We have to stop believing all the things we think we know about people, and start getting curious about who they really are.
What's the biggest challenge you are facing in your life right now? How is that impacting you and what would it mean for you if you could overcome it? I can show you how to overcome this and any other kind of challenge quickly and easily. I can teach you how to solve complex problems with simple solutions, so you can get the results you want while saving you time, money and pain.
Would that be something you would be interested in?
Contact me to find out how you can receive a full one hour Complimentary Breakthrough Coaching Session. This free session can help you get clear about what has been holding you back, and give you the opportunity to create a powerful strategic action plan to help you achieve your goals! Click on the link below to schedule your free Consultation Session today!
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About the author
Tamara Dodgson is a Certified Strategic Intervention Coach and owner with Forward Coaching and Consulting Services. Utilizing the most powerful principles and strategies from master Strategic Interventionists, Tamara offers a sound, knowledgeable and dependable methodology for change. She has successfully helped her clients navigate through hundreds of unique and challenging life situations, often involving complex issues such as addictions, divorce, and criminal proceedings. Tamara empowers her clients by helping them identify what they want, teaching them successful and proven strategies for change and providing them with measurable and lasting results. You can connect with her on Facebook at Forward Coaching & Consulting Services, on LinkedIn at Tamara Dodgson, on her website at www.tamaradodgson.com, or via email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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